You said you were tired of
The thousands little lies
Gentle misgivings like
“I’ll never hurt you”
“I just want to save you.”
You said your heart was burning some truth, something you could hold onto
So here goes:
I am an asshole.
I can’t promise not to hurt you
because I inevitably will
and I’d love to pretend like I didn’t mean to
but, truthfully, I probably did.
And to be perfectly clear
I am not the saving type
because as far as I’m concerned
there’s no one here to save.
And while we’re in the thick of it,
Know that I am not the kind of person to “persevere” through your shit
And I don’t expect you to take any of mine.
I will love you
I will reach into the ends of everything you are
just to understand you
to listen to and honestly hear you.
I will lay my armor down at your feet
and break apart every single scattered piece of me
just to breathe you in
just to see you.
this probably isn’t the fairytale you’ve been searching for
but I swear to you now and forever
that with my every explosion comes another piece of me
you can carve your name into
and with my every word, my every vow, every “I love you”
will eternally be the subtext of
my heart sliding out of my ribcage, through my lungs, across the air
and into your hands